You know you’ve raised em’ right when… ~By:Steph

21448388b155887fd5d72692cee4f539Hope you all enjoyed your Mother’s Day weekend.  I had a really nice weekend and it actually felt like a real weekend.  That doesn’t happen often.  Saturday we did some shopping and my husband took me to Ulta to ahem…grab a Mother’s Day gift for myself.  I did use the proper mom etiquette and tell the kids, “Thank you.” when I walked in with my gift.  Hey, at least I don’t have to sit around thinking, “Really? This is what they thought I’d like?” 😉  Don’t judge me… you know you’ve been there!

My eating has pretty much been right on track this past week. This is a nice change.  I decided to keep myself focused on Mother’s Day.  Saturday evening I made a Strawberry Cream Cheese Delight on an almond crust & a lemon cheesecake on that same almond crust.  Both low carb, both had no added sugars and both had really nice calorie counts of less than 200 cals per serving.  It always freaks me out when I read “low carb” recipes with 5000 calories per serving.  My Noodle and I cut up a ton of fruit and made a fruit plate for Mother’s Day and one for home.

I figured the kitchen was already messy from all that baking nonsense so I may as well try another recipe out.  I’m pretty glad I did.  I tried cloud bread.  For those of you who don’t know what it is, I will put a link.  I found one recipe that called for sour cream instead of cream cheese and decided that’s what I’d try.  I’d already blown through a lot of cream cheese by this time.  I was a little worried about the whipping of the egg whites but, no disasters occurred and we had stiff peaks! I am NOT a baker.  Too many rules, too many bowls and measuring cups, dirtied. All in all the cloud bread was a success and pretty tasty.  I do need to use a flat baking sheet next time rather than, the 15 year old misshapen one that I chose to use. Although, it would make for less interesting shapes. I’m willing to sacrifice my art. I expected these little breads to be pretty gross and not at all bread like.  I was very surprised.  They browned up nicely, had good flavor and had a mouth feel that was very similar to bread. http://pin.it/x2ChXmY

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Low Carb Cloud Bread Top and bottom views.

 

Sunday the Big Guy and I headed to church early, to serve.  We were actually on time. This may or may not have something to do with the fact that Noodle brought Wild Bee and Monster Boy with her later.  They walked into church with some very pretty flowers and on time.  I was a happy mama!  Don’t you love that book “Llama Llama mad at Mama?”  Oops…sidetracked.  My mom and I showed up at church looking like we were trying to be matchy-matchy.  Totally cool, right?  So, a lovely friend, insisted on snapping a picture.  My Mom-mom attended service, it’s always nice to have her visit the church.  Even had a surprise text from my Lucy who informed me that she and her Ricky were playing hookie from their church and visiting ours.  So I had a lot of people I love to pieces, worshiping in one building.

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Me and my Mommy

Headed over to my Mom’s with the food and decided that the girls needed to take a field trip to Ulta and browse the makeup.  Found some fun stuff  got our “free gift with purchase” which is why we went there in the first place and then headed to Dutch Bros. while the men folk bbq’d for us.  Dutch Bros. on a normal day is insane.  Dutch Bros. on Mother’s Day when moms get $1.00 drinks…COMPLETE AND UTTER INSANITY.  We did not help this situation by ordering 9 drinks while we were there.  WHAT? We had to be nice and take the guys something!  Headed back to Mom’s with my sf strawberry/coconut iced green tea and we seriously got out of there for only $18.00.  Plus they made one of our drinks twice and gave it to us with a smile and a “Happy Mother’s Day”!  WOO HOO, extra sf green tea for Mom and me!  Well, maybe…I’m pretty sure I drank them both. It’s good to get all your fluids in. I wasn’t selfish, I was health conscious!

After dinner which was delicious and full of some really healthy choices, we headed to the other room and did makeovers on my Mom and Mom-mom.  The girls and I had fun playing with makeup and they got pampered. End result gave us a very nice picture with 4 generations in it.  My Mom even put on her “fancy hair”!

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I have to say that by far the most interesting part of my Mother’s Day was my Monster Boy’s gift. A little background…my son hates to draw or color and has questionable handwriting.  When we got home on Sunday evening he pulled a paper out of his backpack.  I stared at it for a bit and then said, “Thank you, it’s beautiful.”  I was holding a very neatly handwritten paper with my name on it (spelled incorrectly), tulips drawn on it and colored. He smiles and says, “The teacher gave us time to make our moms a card.  I had my friend ‘A’ write it for me, ‘B’ draws cool things and I picked the design for him to draw and then, ‘C’ colored it because, she had colored pencils.”  I guess you know you’ve raised em’ right when they contract out your Mother’s Day gift in the 5th grade! My little CEO in the making. 😉

 

A fun weekend, had my dessert and stayed on track, got presents…I like presents, and spent time with my crazy butt family!  Wins all around 🙂

Better late than never :) By Steph

IMG_20130814_103913 This is me right after our vacation in the stripes. The other two are pics of clothes I wore TIGHTLY prior to weight loss.

Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday dear Meeeeee, okay you get the point. Well, I am a few days late but, better late than never. Right?

I did my big kicking re-gain’s ass weigh in on Wednesday my 40th birthday. In the 5 weeks between my challenge of getting back to logging my food, working out and eating better, I lost 13.6 of my 16 pound regain. Leaves me with a mere 2.4 pounds to lose and put this nasty little episode behind me. I’m proud of the outcome. No, I didn’t lose 16 pounds in 5 weeks but, I kicked butt and did it the right way. A lot of exercise, meal planning and praying for help. There is nothing to feel bad about there, in my opinion anyway. Oh wait…mines the only one that counts since, it’s my body, my challenge and my life! Okay God gets ultimate claim to it but, still for all accounts and purposes, I’ll claim second on that list!

I’ve had some motivators who probably don’t even realize they’ve motivated me. A lady from church is on her own weight loss journey and reading her check ins, ups and downs, has kept me realistic and focused on the fact that we all have our struggles and our successes. A great friend since high school has stopped taking a backseat in her life and made proactive steps towards improving her life. I see her looking to the Lord, taking a leap of faith and finding a new job, getting out there and coaching her little girls soccer team and just being an all around inspiration. My husband’s faith in me and my capabilities, even when I’m doubting them. The way he works for our family which oh yeah includes me! If he thinks I’m worth working for, shouldn’t I think the same way? My bestie co-blogger (well yeah we suck at the quantity but, it’s all about the quality…right Clint?) and his own struggle with and then stomping all over of re-gain! Plus the numerous other successes he’s had lately. Another friend who has been through the wringer off and on lately and just keeps smiling and moving forward PLUS, joining me on a get our butts in gear challenge and she lost quite a few pounds herself in this time period! If you look for it there are plenty examples of why perseverance is so important to us. We easily recognize it in others but, some of us…OKAY ME ME ME…find it hard to see in ourselves.

Went to the coast camping with my hubby and our 9 month old Bear (okay technically he’s our German Shepard puppy) and still managed to get a lot of movement in, cook some seriously healthy and delicious meals and enjoy ourselves. Let’s see some highlights from the trip…Bear barked and protected us from oncoming traffic for about 30 miles before Joe lost it and decided he was riding in his kennel in the trailer the rest of the way to the ocean, I made it to our pit stop without wetting my pants (I drank A LOT of water and iced coffee on the way there.), Joe got pulled into the ocean by Bear and I laughed hysterically, I got pulled into the ocean by Bear and laughed much less before just giving up and enjoying it, I stepped foot in the ocean DURING SHARK WEEK (I know pretty daring since I’m sure the sharks were very aware what week it was!), spent alone time with my guy and Bear of course, took some amazing walks, relaxed, reconnected as a couple, and of course still managed to LOSE WEIGHT on vacation.

The past couple of weeks I reconnected with my inner tomboy and realized I love riding my bike! Joe took us to the park where they have all these hills, jumps, and courses for BMX riding. I have a beach cruiser and a 40 year old body…neither has any kind of shocks! We rode for hours burned a gazillion (yes I logged it and it said a gazillion 😛 on MFP) calories. It was so much fun going on the course and track. It was incredibly awesome realizing I was CAPABLE of doing this! I had so much fun and we went back the following week too. So last weekend was our second week and the highlight was me going down a huge hill and hitting the track at a bad angle and too fast, thus flipping me off my bike into another hill! I was a big girl and there were no tears…I cannot say there were no bruises though. I am still sporting some pretty nice mementos of the “trip”. We kept riding another 2 hours after that and it was a great family day. I am now on the search for a mountain bike because, well shocks would be really, REALLY, nice to have if I’d like to keep my knees and spine in decent shape (I’m sort of fond of those two things sooo…). I am way into the idea of a new bike but, someone is going to have to mud wrestle me to keep me from taking my big booty seat off my beach cruiser and putting it on the new bike! I like it, it’s very comfy…we’re friends.

ResizedImage_1377897957164 Family pic from my birthday dinner. Can you tell my son has his daddy’s smile? lol

For my birthday went out for dinner and had a nice time. Oh plus the restaurant sang happy birthday to me in Japanese and gave me a dessert that my 3 children promptly ate all of. When we left I decided I required some ice cream so we headed to Coldstone Creamery and I had a half of a kids cup of ice cream after dinner, before deciding I probably should stop eating it because, no one likes puking on their birthday and it wasn’t “that kind” of party sooo…I tossed the ice cream instead. It was delicious though 🙂

I am now on my way to achieving my goal weight. I am keeping up the food logging, exercise and healthy choices (most of the time). I’m not giving myself a timeline because, as long as I am moving in the right direction, I really don’t care how long it takes. I’m happy where I am and I feel wonderful so if I lose more living like this, that will be great. If I don’t, well you know what? That will be great too. 40 feels pretty amazing from my vantage point.

Thanks for listening to (okay yes technically reading) my ramblings and hodgepodge of giddy goofiness.1238185_3447216314959_244113364_n

Hugs and good choices,
~Steph

P.S. I should have just kept eating the ice cream and got sick on my birthday. I’ve been sick since the day after with some kind of tummy thing. I have no clue what is up. Yes, this is me feeling sorry for my tummy! lol

“Well here I am” said Reality as it punched me in the face! By: Steph

I am a bad, bad blogger. I apologize for being so hit or miss on my blogging lately. Have I said, “I’m sorry for not being around?” Okay, okay cut me some slack people. Oh wait…that was just me stressing myself out huh? Okay then…here we go, moving forward 🙂

Life has been stressful the past few weeks and in all honesty more like the last several months. I sat down yesterday and took a good account of myself and realized that I haven’t been “the same” since probably December. Things that happened last year took their toll on me and I lost my dedication to myself. I randomly find it chasing me here and there but, I’m crafty and I’m able to easily shake that pesky dedication. I stopped losing weight in December for the most part. I regained a little and lost it back so February/March during the Healthy Family Challenge I had a great loss but, then the desire to work at it waned again. I have to once again say I was fighting depression and it was winning. Maybe it still is in some ways. I regain, I lose most of the regain and then let it slide again. It’s been a pattern the last few months. God and I talk about this and I tell Him “I’m giving this over to you.” but, I’m pretty sure He knows better than I do that, I haven’t, truly done that, even when I really think and hope that I have. Well, here I am again with regain. I’m angry at myself, I’m sad for myself, I’m blaming myself, I’m feeling sorry for myself, I’m…just focused on myself??? Maybe that is where my problem lies? When my eyes are on God life has a lot more clarity for me. Knowing this is the easy part. Finding my way back to implementing it isn’t quite so easy. I can converse with Him about my friends, my family, the world, etc…but, when I’m feeling so much like a failure, I find it hard to ask Him to help me. I know there are a lot of you out there who are reading this and don’t understand why “god” has anything to do with this. For me, GOD has everything to do with it. I know I wouldn’t have come this far and had these changes in my life without Him. Trust me I tried that for the first 33 years of my life…it didn’t work for me. I must also say that I in no way blame God for this lapse in communication because, I know it rests solely on my shoulders. This isn’t a lesson in my Christianity, it’s just a fact of who I am and how I function I can’t really blog honestly if I leave my faith out of it because, it shapes who I am. If I’m not blogging honestly then what is the point of blogging at all? I guess it would then become more like “creative writing by the creatively writing challenged” instead of a blog.

I’m taking steps to remedy this.

1) I’m meal planning again. No more flying by the seat of my pants and just whimsically deciding to eat fairy dust because, it’s in the pantry. (That darn fairy dust is really carb heavy and causes cravings!)

2) I’m going to restart my restart of my restart to working out again. I mean just randomly running C25K isn’t going to cut it, I need to go back to the basics and get real workouts back into my life. I feel better, I have a better attitude and it’s one of my best prayer times.

3) I’m going to log my meals on mfp and not worry about what anyone has to say about my eating choices. If they don’t understand my lifestyle then why does it bother me that they comment on it? I may even GASP close my food diary to the public.

4) I’m asking for help from Clint, from Joe, from my kids. If they see me mindlessly nibbling they need to point it out. (I will be attaching a picture on here so if you dear readers see someone who vaguely resembles me walking down the street eating something carby and delicious, feel free to chastise, smack or otherwise heckle me/them. You may also want to run incase it’s NOT me and they are carrying pepper spray!)

5) I’m going to remember how hard I worked to get to where I am now. How good it feels to be able to shop in non-plus sized sections of stores. How amazing it is to be able to go out and play with the kids. What it feels like to feel confident enough to ride the Harley with Joe. I’m going to remember what it feels like to have my life back. I’m also going to let go of all the negativity surrounding this surgery. I worked hard before surgery and I worked hard after it. Now that I’m NOT working at it like every weight loss surgery patient HAS TO DO (despite the claims of “you took the easy way out”, my results are the same as anyone who hasn’t had the surgery…I gained weight! I am starting to recognize that I was playing into peoples idea of surgery being the easy way. I was thinking well, I don’t have to log every bite I put in my mouth, I don’t have to exercise 5-6 days a week, I don’t have to work at this. Umm hmm…we see how well that worked. It’s not the easy way out, it just allows you to keep your weight loss moving enough to get you to the point where you physically are able to exercise and help yourself. There are always the exceptions to the rule though. I mean we all know a 110 pound 6 foot tall couch potato who eats 6 Big Macs a day and never gains a pound. Just like there are WLS (weight loss surgery) folks who drop and keep off a ton of weight while never exercising a day in their life. The people in these examples are the EXCEPTIONS. For most of the world, rules are rules, don’t take in more calories than you burn and if you want to eat a bit extra, then you better move your rear end if you want it to not wind up on your rear end!

6) I’m going to find alternatives to eating when I’m stressed yet, too busy to even do 10 minutes of stair climbing or 50 squats. I would love some input on this one. Prayer is a definite one I will implement, standing on one leg for 60 seconds trying to balance without falling and cracking my head open is a suggestion…thank you Clint S.P. for that one! Any other 60 second or less fixes that I can do with a herd of children here and a noise level of a small rock concert like oh…Woodstock? Umm and no Super Gluing my lips together is totally out…how would I yell at my children tell my kids I love them?

7) Venting on my blog…oh wait…check I just did that one!

Anyone out there who has dealt with regain and stopped it before it got out of control, I would love to hear what tools and strategies helped you the most. Doesn’t matter if it’s a wls peep or not, we are all in this together. Are we not?

I thank you all for listening…reading…falling asleep two lines in or filing your nails while on this page. (It all shows up as a “view” to me!)

Soon to report that the final 30 stinking pounds of this journey are GONE! There is nothing I can think of that would be more exciting to blog about than the post titled…IN MAINTENANCE GOAL REACHED!!! So, stay tuned folks and be chatty. Heckle, cheer on or just tell me your story!

Reeling from Reality (who packs a mighty mean punch).

~Steph

PS people, be expecting fun food vessel pics this week. I am making avocado boats, stuffed zucchini, bell pepper Philly Cheesesteak cups, and bell pepper tacos. They should be cute, portion controlled and tasty…I’ll keep you updated!

Excuses, realizations and a little recap of the past two weeks.

I am the first one to admit that I am often full of excuses. See…at least I’m mostly honest 🙂 The thing is it’s so stinking easy to make excuses. It’s too hot, it’s too cold, it’s raining, it’s sunny, it’s February, it’s October, blame it on Barney, blame it on Fred.

The past couple weeks I have been workout impaired. I mean I was so busy with playing softball, party planning for my daughters high-school graduation, support groups, Father’s Day, Christmas in June, ok not really but, you get the point. Right? Well those are EXCUSES. I could have gotten my lazy booty out of bed and worked out in the mornings. I just didn’t. I will be remedying that very soon. I pinkie promise.DSC_0077 DSC_0133

This week I came to a realization as well. I am way closer to my goal weight than I had imagined. I guess part of me knew this but, was scared to admit it. I know that many of you would look at me and think, “There is still a lot of weight to be lost. But, honestly if I take into account the “skin” issues, I really don’t have a lot to lose. I have definition to gain and muscle still to be built but, in all honestly not a lot of weight left to rid myself of. I have a friend online who was in the same size clothing as me and weighed a bit more to begin with but, was also several inches taller than me. She had skin removal surgery on her torso. She went from a size 14 to an 8-10. She looks phenomenal now but, she looked pretty spectacular before too. That put a lot into perspective for me. Because when I looked at her before surgery pics we were pretty similar in size. So, I studied a picture of myself and came to the conclusion that I would like to lose about 10-15 more pounds vs the 25-30 I had in my head. It’s almost scary to be this close to something I’ve never known. Honestly this weight I am currently holding at is uncharted territory for me as well. I wasn’t even this small in Jr. High. LOL I just used the word “small” to describe my size. I understand I am far from “small” but, it still made me smile a little!

This is the picture I tortured myself with by dissecting every part of my body! As I said, there is a definite need for a few more pounds gone in the midsection but, there is also a lot that I am incapable of changing without surgery in that same section, as well as in my arms (super hero wings)/thighs. parkI’m actually ok with how I look and I’m not ashamed of the things I can’t change. I have worked my butt off for this “extra empty skin”. I would rather have it and be healthy than be unhealthy and have firm skin.

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For my next trick I will do the common yet never old refrain of….I have no time to cook, we have to eat fast food or grab-n-go stuff like sandwiches or cheese and LOTS of crackers. There is no time to eat healthy without cooking two meals. One for me and one for Joe and the kids.

I call POPPYCOCK on myself. Just to prove it I made a run to the grocery store, cooked dinner, and cleaned up on the clock. Since I work from home, I didn’t time my trip to the store only the trip into the store and home. I had to get creative with these times because, I again, work from home and bought these groceries earlier in the day so they were already here when I went to cook, I wasn’t just walking in the door. However, I have 8 kids here and it’s not like I am not just as busy as someone walking in the door after work.

So here’s my meal plan and some times for you. Steak fajitas, salad, fresh avocado, and watermelon cubes.

10 minutes in the store to grab an avocado, tortillas and premade pack of fajita meat/veggies. (That’s all I needed for this meal.)
5 minutes to drive home.
10 minutes prep for; romaine, tomato, avocado, and watermelon. Plus had the pan warming up on medium high heat.
5 minutes from start to finish throwing meat/veggie mixture in hot pan and sautéing it. I heated a good skillet nice and hot so I didn’t have to use any oil.
2 minutes to assemble the plates AND take the pictures of the finished product.
5 minutes to clean, two knives, a spoon, cutting board and one sauté pan.
Dinner is served. So I put a healthy, delicious, versatile meal for me and my family, on the table from store to mouth, in less than 40 minutes. If I had preplanned this meal and had the ingredients on hand, it would have been under 25 minutes. Serve it on our fine china (aka heavy duty paper plates) and you won’t even have to load the dishwasher afterward. I chose real plates because, well…I like them!

I know you are thinking 15 minutes to order, pay and drive home with McBurgerBell. But, think about it like this…mine took a little longer but, I just saved myself the next 24 hours of berating myself for making crappy food choices for dinner! I don’t need a half bottle of antacids to sleep because, the mock food keeps revisiting me. PLUS…I saved money!

For my husband’s I used a regular sized plate, and added tortillas, light sour cream and cheese. For my own I used a salad plate and added light sour-cream and shredded Mexican blend cheese, skipping the tortilla. The romaine was topped with diced tomato and avocado with salt, pepper and light Italian dressing (I wanted lime over it instead but, ahem…someone forgot the lime at the store. You really just can’t find good help these days! Okay fine…it was me.)

A couple things I will admit about quick cooking. I spent a bit more on the fajita mix than I would have if I’d just premade my own, seasoned them and stuck packets of them in the freezer to pull out (which is my future plan). You could easily purchase precut fruit but, I am cheap…okay in the good frugal kinda way not the hoochie kinda way, and I refuse to pay 3x as much for precut fruit that’s already soggy from sitting. I would have used pre-shredded romaine but, I already had the head of romaine and wasn’t going to waste it. The avocado at $1.50 was a bit of a splurge too but, well worth the price as it was quite delicious(…shut up Clint!) and added a lot of flavor to the salad plus healthy fats and vitamins.

Nutritional breakdown for my entire meal 2.5 oz meat, 1.5 oz veggies, 1/2 cup romaine, 1/2 tomato, 1/2 small avocado, 1 tsp. light Italian dressing, 1 TBL light sour cream, 1 TBL cheese and 1/2 cup of watermelon:
337 calories, 21 carbs, 21 fat (11 grams of a healthy fat from avocado), 22 protein, 7 fiber, 10 sugar

Hope you come up with your own quick, easy and healthy meals for busy nights. Just think, if we spend a little more time in the kitchen making dinner instead of a lot of time at chain fast food restaurants making excuses, maybe, just maybe when our kids are grown, they won’t be blogging about their weight loss struggles and how awful their parents were for feeding them unhealthy food. I mean sure they’ll still end up in therapy blaming us for everything else but, at least we’ll have ONE win in our pocket!

Stay cool people 🙂

~Steph

C25K update, eating, losing weight, family time and Salad in a Jar update. By: Steph

First thing I have to start with what is on my heart. Moore, Oklahoma is in pain today and my prayers are with them. I can’t imagine what they are waking up to this morning, if they were even able to rest last night. There is so much to be said and yet, I find myself lacking the words so, I will just PRAY.

I am officially into Week 4 of C25K and completed day 1 this morning. It’s a big jump from last week and I was very worried about my ability to complete the run. I chose to slow down my pace to allow myself to stick with the run and not have to stop for a walk. I am pretty sure that I was passed by turtles and snails this morning but, thankfully the garage was semi-dark and I didn’t have to see them whizzing past my treadmill. I totally kicked the sloths butt though so, at least I can brag about that 🙂 I am trying to not feel guilty about lowering the pace to maintain the run. Anyone with advice on whether this was the right move or not, is welcome to chime in. I will say that my heart rate stayed up nicely and I can definitely feel the extra running in my legs. Those are positives I am happy with. So, come on people give me input. Did I totally mess up by slowing down? Is it better to go faster and have to stop running and walk a few seconds before returning to the run portion?

I have been participating in small daily challenges with the lovely Clint. My favorite workout last week was basically me trying to “guess” what our surprise challenge would be for the day. So, I did 100 (on the exercise ball modified) push-ups (yes I have sissy arms and they hurt for 3 days after), 100 jumping jacks, 100 weighted squats, 100 sit-ups, 100 crossover crunches (that ended up being the challenge), 100 weighted lunges, 50 bicep curls, 50 triceps extensions and 200 kick punch combos to the heavy bag. It was fun playing around trying different things and mixing my workout up plus it was a quick little workout since I had snoozed my alarm WAY too many times that morning. Today’s mini challenge is to watch an online workout video that you’ve never done and complete it. I chose some weight training for my upper body coupled with squats. Who needs to be able to lift their arms the next day? Not me apparently 😛

Blessedly I am doing pretty well with eating better and getting back to the workout thing. Last week I may not have been perfect in my food choices but, I made a lot more good ones than bad ones. That’s the path to maintaining weight loss for me.

I have lost several of the pounds of regain. Still working towards having a clean slate and getting back to real loss. I have to admit though that I just feel so much stronger and motivated when I am working my plan. It boosts my self esteem and it keeps me focused on the right things.

Sunday we decided to have a much needed family day and headed to the lake. My mom drove the kids while I got chauffeured around on the Harley by my handsome Big Guy. We hung out at the lake and then headed to a nearby town for some lunch. I made good choices and focused on protein for snacks and lunch…then I had about 1/4 cup of “homemade” Huckleberry ice cream which was so worth the splurge by the way!

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Came home to find my oldest home from a day swimming and taking more senior pictures. She was having trouble breathing (oldest and youngest have asthma…another perk of California’s Central Valley) and we headed to the ER for breathing treatments, steroids and Mommy/Jessie bonding time until the wee hours of the morning.

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Monday was a blur and I find it very hard to believe I was actually awake for it after a day in the sun and no sleep on top of it.

The salad in a jar experiment is over. I tested it with only the lids in place without creating the vacuum seal. I just ran to the fridge because, I realized I had forgotten there was still one in there. One week later and lettuce was still crisp and looked great. I didn’t however try it because, it also had week old chicken in it and I am a sissy about stuff like that. I would say that Salad in a Jar is a huge success 🙂

Headed to the kitchen to make up some chicken salad for this week and to cook the day-care kids some lunch before they revolt and order pizza with my cell phone.

Have an amazing week and hug your loved ones tight. Give them a call and tell them, “I love you.” if they aren’t close enough to grab.

Hugs to you all,

~Steph

Mother’s Day and realizations from last week… By: Steph

First off I would like to mention that my daughter went to her Senior Prom on Saturday. She looked lovely and it was kind of “sigh worthy” seeing the kids get into the limo and take off. She’s moving at breakneck speed and I miss the little girl she was yesterday. Luckily as you can see from the photo she’s still in there somewhere 🙂
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Last week I went to two different support groups. They were both really great and really different. We have a new nutritionist at the first one and she is shaking the whole support group up and making it more fun and interactive, yet leaving us with a lot of information at the same time. I admitted my weight regain and told everyone about my plans to reverse it. Went home and felt ok about it. At the second one I was sitting in group listening to several ladies and gentlemen telling their stories of people sabotaging or judging them because, they knew they had surgery. I spoke up to say that I really felt that my issues were more internal than external. I again admitted my regain and then it happened, the tears came and I blurted out, “Since I went public with my surgery it’s like I am trying to prove all the critics right. Like I wanted to reinforce their preconceived notion that this was going to fail like everything else.” It stunned me and the tears started flowing. I had no idea that was going to come out of my mouth. I had no clue that, that was the trigger for my spiral out of control. I’m not sure what made it surface or why it happened at that moment but, it was freeing and defeating at the same time. It isn’t the bad anniversaries that are all starting to hit, it wasn’t just lack of self control, it was genuine fear of success and people knowing about my hard work to find it. When I finished speaking several of the group were in tears and the therapist who runs it started directing helpful information my way. It came down to crossing boundaries. I have a fear of people getting too close and of people knowing me too well. Go figure as I blog away…even though I feel as though I’ve conquered much of it, that is on the surface allowing me to do stuff like blog or meet with others to discuss my story. This fear was deeper inside and more crippling. I needed to establish boundaries within myself. I needed to stop allowing my mind to mistreat me and to convince me to fail.

I’m not sure how I will go about this but, as I begin to recognize it I am becoming more and more aware of how easy it is for me to allow it. It’s going to be a long road and I’m sure you’ll hear more about it in the future. Right now I have to figure myself out and manage to stay on track at the same time.

Mother’s Day was an excellent day. We woke up got ready and headed out to church. But, not before I received two of the cutest presents from two of the cutest elementary school kids I know. My Ebby made me a construction paper portrait of myself complete with blond highlights in it’s hair and uplifting statements of the reasons she loves me and the things I do for her. My Jo-jo made me a sweet dancing flower in a pot and a little note. Later the family (meaning my incredible husband) brought out a beautiful oval vase for the flowers he brought home on Friday, a drink dispenser for parties and entertaining, and a pair of workout pants which were a bit too big! It’s always nice to have things be too big instead of too small 🙂

We had my Mom, Brother and Grandma (Mom-mom) over for a healthy lunch of salad, grilled steak or chicken pesto sandwiches with fresh watermelon slices. We had freshly sliced (by Ebby) strawberries and light Cool Whip for dessert. It was a light, healthy and fabulous lunch and time with family. Clean up was easy and after lunch the kids hit the pool as it was 102 degrees here. That evening after company had left I changed into my swimsuit and hit the pool with the kids. I swam 100 laps for my workout challenge of the day. I had no idea how many actual “real laps” that would equal but, it felt great and I was good and tired afterward. We also did our segment on the radio show Sunday evening and then called it a night after making up lunches for today.

I am truly blessed by the family that God has allowed me. I am also blessed with the opportunity He has given me to change my life. Maybe it was never His intention that I only lose weight but, His plan also included the ability to let go of the things within myself that hold me back in life. I’m working on it and praying about it. I have great faith that it will happen.

Thanks for reading and please leave a comment if you have any questions or advice.

Hugs,

~Steph

P.S. I am on Day 1/Week 3 of C25K and feeling good about my progress. I’m glad I was pushed (CLINT) to get back to it!

Couch25K Update (End of Week 5)

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When I started the couch25K trick I scanned the training schedule and immediately focused on today’s workout as it stuck out like a sore thumb as the smart kids say. On Wednesday I walked five and ran eight twice. That was fine. Today says I need to run twenty consecutive minutes after a five minute walk.

For runners or people who are in any kind of shape I would think this twenty minute thing is not a big deal. For me I have never run twenty consecutive minutes in my life. I think I ran about sixteen minutes once doing a pre-season test for high school football. That was twenty six years ago and it sucked very badly.

It is both a physical and mental challenge for me. I will know in less than forty five minutes for sure but I think this right now. I think there are 100 reasons I will not be able to complete it.

Call me Captain Flip-Flop though as I still think I will. That is an awkward feeling……

BTW, my pops just gave me an excellent tip. He suggested that I should not die while doing the run as it would probably ruin the Kentucky Derby for him….bahahahahahahahaha

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Well, that went better than expected. I completed it without any major problems. Some discomfort in the back but nothing really worth mentioning. I unfortunately am one of those who runs the scenarios through his head before they happen. I suspected that around minute eighteen I would be cursing myself for being an idiot and getting myself into this. I also thought I would be dreaming up ways to tell my excellent sister that the 5K we are planning on July 20th is not going to happen.

Instead, right about that time I thought that I could do more than the twenty minutes if I wanted to. It turns out I did want to and I went for twenty-two minutes. Why? ………….because I could and because it was my way of telling couch25K that they were going to be my bitch by the time this is done! bahahahahahaha. Cheers -Clint

P.S. The best part was getting back and finding a congrats message from the excellent Stephanie saying she knew I would do it. Thanks Q.O.R.E!